Dear Uncle Sam,
Thanks for the $1,200 “Stimulus Check” you sent earlier this year. I didn’t need it, I can’t go shopping or eat out so maybe it was too much. I would love a trip to Home Depot to buy some unnecessary power tools or screwdrivers, but I’m 70 and I can’t venture out of the house.
I’m sorry I haven’t been able to stimulate the economy after you shut down everything. We are all wondering why you sent both me and my wife a total of $2,400 anyway.
We are not employed or unemployed. Our house is paid for, no car notes, no credit card debt, a nice fat Schwab account and you guys send us Social Security Checks every month for about $3,500 a month tax free.
Life is good!
Frankly, Uncle Sam I read that you owe a National Debt of way more than $26 Trillion Dollars… plus the $2,400 you borrowed to send our checks.
My friends say you just printed the money out of think air. I think they’ve been watching too much fake news. (You can’t just create money out of thin air!)
Thanks anyway. And good luck paying down that debt!
P.S. Oh, feel free to send us another $2,400 at your earliest convenience. Much appreciated.